Life.. and all that stuff

I won’t count how many days it has been since I’ve opened this screen up and wrote to you.  I won’t even say I’ve thought about it in the last 6 months because I’m not sure I did.  LIfe has been one whirlwind change after another this year and I’m still trying to find out if it was for the best.  Regardless it is my life and I’m living it.

Life is complicated, it is hard one day and easy the next.  It is fun some times and sucks big time at others. You do things you regret and regret not doing other stuff.  The bottom line is all those things, the fun times, hard times, the regrets, they make up your life.  They make you appreciate the good stuff and honestly the bad days don’t seem so bad when you are looking  back.

Why am I sitting here telling you life is crazy roller coaster of ups and downs? Why am I tellling you to hang in there, it’ll be okay? Because all too often we get caught up in the emotion of the moment. If you are reading this right now, I want you to know that tomorrow it won’t seem so bad.  Tomorrow may not be great but it will be one day closer to better .

Someone once accused me of analyzing them every time we spoke.  That was probably true.  It isn’t that I am judging or trying to fix anyone but it is that I think my brain is hard wired to look at something and simplify it. Find solutions.  Like a puzzle.  Lately I’ve been analyzing myself.  Trying to find out if the peices to my puzzle actually fit.   Decide what I can do to simplify things.

Then I take a look around,  my oldest son is about to get married.  My youngest son is about to turn 18.  We got a puppy. I took on a new job with more time away and more responsiblity. I keep trying to get back on the be healthy bandwagon and I’m pretty sure turning 40 just broke my body and my willpower.  One of the only things that stands solid and hasn’t up and changed on me is my husband.  He is like a rock and supports me in every life changing decision I make regardless of what he things and how it effects him.  Thank god, right.  Have you seen my life lately.

One of my mantras lately is, “Tomorrow will be better.”  There is a magnet on my fridge that my step daughter gave me that says, “Courage does not roar.  Sometimes it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying I will try again tomorrow.”  When I have shitty days, when I’m tired, and I completely failed my goals for the day I don’t beat myself up.  I tell myself that tomorrow will be better.

I’m not complaining about my life.  It is a good life with amazing opportunities and it is full of people I love who love me.  And if sometimes I feel like it sucked then I know those less fortunate that me do to.

Life, and all that stuff.  Chin up!

JJ